Who Knew Us Special Needs Parents Are Superheroes?

When you say Superhero, everyone envisages a heroic, handsome or beautiful caped idol, who of course has a super power!

Um, I’m not sure I fit the bill!

Or do I?

Let me take you back to those Primary School days. These were the days when I lived on the edge of my seat, never fully being involved in my day to day tasks, and instead just waiting and dreading my phone to ring!

The ‘can you come and collect him’ phone call, the, ‘we need an urgent meeting phone call’, and eventually, the, ‘exclusion’ phone call. Everyday I would await the call just praying that he hadn’t hurt, yet another child.

I even changed my ring tone for the schools number to, ‘Help’, that famous song by the Beatles, in the hope that I’d feel less nervy! (It didn’t work, but everyone else thought it was funny!)

I remember, to well, those playground days, the death stares and whispers from the other parents. The smiles through gritted teeth, as they steer their child in the opposite direction.

The end of the day, ‘finger point’, from the class teacher, “Mrs Coxhead, can I have a word”. (And ironically, these were good days! We’d made it through to the end of the day!)

I would see all the mums handing their children party invitations to hand out, knowing full well we would never receive one.

Away from school, we’d attempt the ‘normal’ daily events, like shopping or going to the park, and in true Aiden style, he would lay on the floor screaming, or throwing everything and anything in site – I just hoped it wasn’t a smaller child who, just happened, to be tottering by at totally the wrong time, or an inquisitive dog, checking out what all the noise was about or worst of all, the ‘well meaning’, old granny (you know the ones!) but no matter what the scenario, the stares, comments and judgments would flow freely.

Inside, I was crushed! I just want the ground to swallow me up! Yep, the drain looked like a great place to be right now! And everyday I would vow never to leave the house again!

Then, one day, it was probably one of those days when everything that could have gone wrong, did go wrong, and I was well and truly in the gutter, I realised – Actually, all this shit was for a purpose! The purpose was ‘training!’ Yes, I was in training, training how to gain my “Super Power!”


Mission Accomplished!

Suddenly, I grew… (some say bollocks!) I was thinking more like a shell! I developed a Super Strength, Super Speed and Super Humour! Yes you got it –

I became a ‘Ninga Turtle!’

You may laugh! You may think I’ve gone mad! Um! Maybe I have, just a little, but it’s true!

I had spent my life living in what felt like the sewer (just like the Ninga Turtles) and without my Super Powers I couldn’t get out.

My shell was my new found protection from those judgmental onlookers. Even if, inside, I was crying, my protective shell kept me safe, bold and brave.

My Super Strength gave me an inner force to fight for my son. I had the strength to fight the education system, stand up to the discrimination and for once, be proud of my son!

My Super Speed, well, that was always more tortoise than turtle! Probably all those Pizzas! (The Ninga Turtles ate them!) But it gave me the energy I needed, not just survive, but actually enjoy Aiden.

However, I believe, it was the Super Humour, which is what got me through each day. I learned to see the funny side, even when, it probably wasn’t really that funny.

Life as a Superhero was so much easier! I was always kind and polite, but, I stopped caring about what other people thought, if I thought something needed saying, I would just say it and if I thought something was right for Aiden, I did my dammed hardest to make sure it happened.

It dawned on me that no one else was going to fight for Aiden like I would, no one else knew Aiden like I did, and no one else would put Aidens best interests before anyone else’s!

I had to be his advocate.

A Ninga Turtle? A Superhero? Dress it up how you like – but your it’s your Mind Set that counts! A positive Mind Set is everything!

Believe in yourself!


Believe in your child!

People will always make judgments we can’t stop them but we can hold our head up high and think NINGA!

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