All I ever wanted was to be a Mum and to have lots of children. So when the doctors broke the news to me that Morgan had cystic fibrosis and it was quite possible that Aiden and my unborn baby, Finley could have the same genetic disease I felt numb inside.
That wasn’t part of the life I had planned, nor was it the childhood I had planned for my children!
It instantly felt like a dark shadow was cast over our family. But somehow I had to find the strength to carry on, which of course I did.
But that when the what ifs… hit me, and just when I thought I was getting my head around it, they would bombard me, over and over again.
What if there are germs on that toy, What if someone passes on their cold to them, What if they get really sick, What if they never reach their next birthday, what if they die? Day in, day out, trying to rationalise things or get a balance between normal and neurotic became mentally draining and began to wear me down.
Spending time in and out of hospital, much time alone with only my thoughts, along with the reality of how my whole could change in a flash, makes you reevaluate your outlook on life.
So very quickly I knew I had to find a way to get a handle on my thinking.
I realised I had two choices.
I could live in fear of what might happen or I could enjoy the time I had with my babies, doing what I had always dreamed of, which was, to be a mum.
For me, It was a no brainer! Morgan was laying in a tiny cot with an oxygen tent over his head and I vowed, from that day, I would do the latter. The boys would live the most normal, full and fun life possible in whatever time they had.
When you live like there is no tomorrow the world is a care free place! You are grateful for everything, you prioritise everything, and you enjoy everything.
The Starlight Children’s Charity has an instrumental part to play in creating magical experiences for children who’s tomorrow isn’t promised.
We were so grateful to Starlight, who granted Aiden’s wish to watch the 2010 World Cup in South Africa.
The memories we made there will last forever. Aiden still talks about our trip now, some 11 years later. The sound of the vuvuzelas , the street dancers and the ridiculously cold swimming pool at the hotel are all up there as fabulous memories, along with the buffalo that charged at the truck while on a safari, the rhino that followed us and the elephants that had no tusks. Plus so much more.
Aiden is now 21 and Morgan is 18. They reached every single childhood milestone birthday. And they continue to live their best lives.
If I could take away their Cystic Fibrosis of course I would, but I am truly grateful for the Mum it made me, because without CF I wouldn’t be who I am today and my kids wouldn’t have have the childhood they had.
I am taking part in the 100 Skip’s a day challenge in August, to raise money for other families out there that are giving their kids their best, fun, full and most normal lives possible in whatever time they have.
Please sponsor me if you can. I know it’s not pretty watching me jump up and down with every part wobbling around, but it wouldn’t be a challenge if I was super slim and fit now would it!
Life is what you make it! You have a choice – choose your best life!
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